I've decided something, I'm going to attempt to stick with this, yet again, and try to keep myself posting pretty regularly. I don't know i it will succeed, but I'm going to try. I guess I've just gotten to the point where I need to pour my emotions out in words, because there are quite a few emotions, and quite a few words to describe them. One thing I do have to say --before I continue-- is that, while I try to keep a positive outlook on life, sometimes, I am in a bad place, and I apologize for subjecting you to that. Right now, my life basically just plain SUCKS. Look at that, you got all three, Bold, Italicized, AND underlined :p. But seriously, it's not a joyride. I wish I could tell you otherwise. HOWEVER, I am in marching band right now, and that is keeping me joyful, even in hardships, I have that escape, that refuge, that cool, dark, quiet room in a world of utter chaos<3<3<3 But when I'm not marching, life is pretty crappy, I'm alone yet again, I'm being forced into staying in a situation that I just want to escape, and I'm ready to just....*~poof~* (the sound of me spontaneously evaporating) I keep my emotions to myself for the most part, and quite honestly, it's like dragging fiery claws along the lining of my mind, tearing the spinal cord from my cerebrum, slowly, and painfully. My mind is no longer a sanctuary, but a place of torment. Yet, the two are becoming synonomous really. My torment is becoming kind of safe, comfortable, and not obtrusive. That scares me more than anything... I just hope that I come out of this situation better than when I went into it. Gah... I just need to remember: Love is stronger than hate, healing stronger than pain. I'm going to repeat what I've stated in earlier posts. To anyone reading this, if you are struggling with life right now, you are not alone, I'm right there with you, and I love you. Keep your head high, and know that life will be okay<3
~Malachi~